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Those Lessons Learned and Relearned
Breaking Free of Regret Regret Isn’t so Useful Last week we thanked our younger selves. Looking back can be so complex. So often pain stands out yelling loud and clear while those moments of beauty are swept into oblivion. When we look back, even when we are seeking gratitude, we may find that regret emerges.…
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See Things Differently Feel Things Differently
Reframing aka Reappraisal and Emotion The Practice of Changing Our Minds Gratitude is a powerful tool for reframing or reappraisal which is simply intentionally seeing something from a different perspective. The benefits of reappraisal can not be understated. It helps us to: have empathy communicate more effectively with people who are different than us open…
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Is Negativity Realistic?
Bell Hooks calls it absolutely disenabling Negativity Stops Me in My Tracks I am currently reading All About Love by Bell Hooks where I came across a wonderful passage exploring negativity, positivity and taking responsibility. Because we have learned to believe negativity is more realistic, it appears more real than any positive voice. Once we begin…
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Where I Lay My Head
The essentials that surround us. Sick and Cold and Alone and Wondering That's how I woke up this morning. I hadn't turned on my space heater and my bedroom isn't heated otherwise. My blankets were not cutting it once that low of 21 degrees hit. And to make matters worse I was sick to my stomach.…
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Celebrating the Wins
Wins large and small. The Day after an Election and Other Days Too When we see the results of an election there are almost always wins and losses. These larger wins and losses are a great example for the itty bitty wins and losses that we experience on an average Wednesday. It can be so…
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Mining for Possibilities
Replacing your reactions with possibilities. What is Possible? Our reactions, whether emotions, actions or just thoughts, are so mindless and automatic. That isn't always a bad thing. I mean, really, it might just save our asses when we are driving. But outside of those times when split-second reaction time is necessary we can change our…
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The Unlikely Gratitude Expert
I must confess. I am grumpy. And grateful. Yes, We Can We can be grateful. Not just us. Everyone can. Even the most grumpy person we know. The most cynical. The most punk rock. The most intellectual. The most in pain. Depressed. Worried. Hopeless. Addicted. Everyone is grateful for something at one time or another.…
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Grief and Self Touch
Appreciating your body with touch. Intentional Self Touch During Times of Grief I have been thinking a lot about grief and loss. There are people in our gratitude community who are experiencing profound losses right now. And there are people in my other communities, people in the country and all over the world, who are…
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Saying Yes to This Moment
What is possible here? I’d Heard It Before but Still Needed to Hear It I’m reading this great book that I highly recommend for anyone who is interested in systems and transformation especially on a large scale. It is called Emergent Strategy by Adrienne Maree Brown. It is one of those books that is exciting…
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Ever Feel Like You Aren’t Doing Enough?
Small Matters That Post-Inspiration Paralysis A few of you replied to the email last week to tell me how much you loved what I wrote. You were brought to tears. You were inspired. You want to do it. Really. Sing your big and beautiful swan sang. Make your mark. Feel proud of yourself. Go big.…
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Could Be Better Could Be Worse
Up and down. Down and up. Could be better. Could be worse. A Blessing from a Stranger at Walmart I very rarely go to Walmart. When I do it's usually very late at night when the other stores are closed. So just before midnight on Sunday night there I was walking the aisles of Walmart.…
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Open to a New Way of Seeing
We are resilient. We are grateful. Take a Breath. Sink into This. What a year. It hasn't been the greatest. But here we all are. Resilient and often grateful. Through the darkness we trekked. Through the pain we grew. Through the loneliness we found each other. We are here. With a new way of seeing.…
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Don’t Be Blinded by Gratitude
Not everything is beautiful. In what ways does seeing the darkness of the world bring you hope? Seeing the Darkness and Finding Hope As I mourn yet another mass shooting I am reflecting on being grateful but not ONLY being grateful. I would hate for a gratitude practice to be blinders to seeing the tragedies…
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Breathing is Enough
Me too. Let’s just take a breath together. Letting Ourselves Off the Hook of Gratitude I’ve been writing a series of these about difficult times and grief. After last week I declared that to be the last of the series and I would move to more positive and feel good topics. But then “me too”…
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Breathing is Enough
Me too. Let’s just take a breath together. Letting Ourselves Off the Hook of Gratitude I’ve been writing a series of these about difficult times and grief. After last week I declared that to be the last of the series and I would move to more positive and feel good topics. But then “me too”…
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A Poem of Blessings for Times of Grief
These words. Like a soothing bubble bath for your soul. Beannacht, the Gaelic Word for Blessings by John O'Donohue On the day when The weight deadens On your shoulders And you stumble, May the clay dance To balance you. And when your eyes Freeze behind The gray window And the ghost of loss Gets in…
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In Outrage and in Gratitude
Don’t cover your eyes to it. Don’t ignore it. Take care of yourself too. Being Grateful When The World is So Fucked Up Gratitude ≠ Happiness Darkness is not a lack of gratitude. Authentic gratitude comes from looking at the world with eyes wide open. It is not protected behind blinders – ignoring the horrors…
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Great Works Started and Sustained
You have so much to offer the world. Tapping Into Your Softness and Strength The rain came thunderous and hard then soft and gentle. Afterward I went outside to enjoy the cool summer air. The light all around was soft and airy. It was the middle of the day but everything seemed so still and…
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What Do You Stand For?
We stood for peace. We stood for equity. Then we had dinner together. Start In This Moment If you want to create a better future. Start in this moment. Take a stand. It was easy for me to say that I am against white supremacy but I struggled to put into words what I was taking…
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If You Want To See Something Ugly
This Basquiat quote is just so damn true. Seeing It All Do you want to see the ugliness in the world? Do you want to see the beauty in the world? It isn't really a choice. We have the capacity for both. But we just have to remember that if we want to see…